A cat flap in action

Regular readers of my postcards will recall that every now and again I make oblique references (and sometimes not so oblique) references to my cats.  One of my first postcards was about My cats – My “children”.

At the moment I have three cats, or perhaps I should say that at the moment three cats have adopted me as a surrogate “something or other” – master / substitute mother / food dispenser / masseur …  or even as their own “pet” – ranging from a sedately veteran of 15 or 16 to a sprightly and lively young kitten.

The numbers vary from time to time: my first cat, (here in Kyrgyzstan, that is – I had one when I was in London – but he died of liver failure), was called Sinock, (which basically means Sonny).  He was kidnapped … or stolen … literally … the ladies that picked him up and carried him off were seen climbing into a taxi by a neighbour.

Since then, others cats have come and gone … some have just wandered in and mewed – demanding attention, to be fed or cuddled, others were  abandoned or dropped on us by people who seemed to know that we would take them in, and yet others were born in the office as their mother decided to get pregnant before we could take her to the vets.  On the other side of the coin, we have managed  we’ve managed to find homes for some, others have decided to strike out and wandered off … and, for all I know, some may have met the same fate as Sinock – and got kidnapped.

Visitors often notice the cats in the office – let’s be honest, … it’s a bit difficult not to notice them.

Their reactions vary from a shocked, “Goodness gracious me, it’s a cat!”, to a fawning “Ohhh, how sweet!” … and, I have to admit, the occasional shudder from someone who really does not like, or has an allergy to, cats … in which case I quickly grasp the moggy in question and remove them to another room.

Although lots of people here in Kyrgyzstan have pets, they can present a number of problems.  Of course, there are the bills – food, (which can be pretty substantial, especially when you have five hungry mouths to feed), cat litter and vet fees.

Although there were pet shops which specialized in everything for your furry friends – at first it was actually difficult to find a regular supply of cat food … most cats were brought up on scraps and special cans and packets were more or less unheard of.  Nowadays, at least, virtually every supermarket carries a supply.

Cat litter remains a problem – as supplies tend to be sporadic.  I got over that problem by getting a shredder and now more or less every piece of paper, once it’s been used on both sides, gets shredded to be recycled.  That might deal with the practicalities – but there is still a need for copious amounts of Air Freshener to be sprayed from time to time to deal with the odour.

Vet fees, well, fortunately the cats are all relatively healthy and apart form the “operation”, it tends to be only when one has an accident or gets into a fight that it necessitates a trip to the vet.

I am sometimes asked if I wouldn’t prefer a dog … and I must admit that I have been tempted … but practical common sense dictates that if I really want a pet, it should be a cat rather than a dog.  Whereas dogs are very sociable, they form attachments to people and don’t like being left alone. (which means that they can be very demanding, what with the need for regular exercise … for which they really need to be accompanied – a need which I would find difficult to accommodate), cats tend to fairly independent, territorial creatures that form an attachment to a place rather than people.  They can be affectionate, but are happy to arrange their own devices – especially when it comes to exercise – so few adjustments to the daily routine are called for.

More to the point, however, is the fact that I live in a small apartment – and there really isn’t room for a dog … unless it’s a really small one – about the size of a cat.

This brings me to what is, in some respects, one of the biggest problems: access – entrances and exits.

Most of the private houses are single strorey dwellings – although there are some that rise to two or three floors.  Obviously, for those that live in private houses, life is a little easier … for those of us living in apartments, even if only on the second floor, (first floor to the Brits), the routine of opening doors to let the cat out at night becomes quite an undertaking.  It also means that it is difficult for the animal to get back in … they can’t exactly ring the doorbell to get their owners’ attention.

One way that I tried to get round this was to get someone to make a “kennel” – a sort of “cat house”, a bit like Snoopy’s “dog house”.  It sort of worked, after a fashion, but the cats being independently minded tended ot ignore it and find ways in and out of time little holes to get into neighbouring cellars, into the foundations under the building or alongside the water and heating pipes where they were in culverts.

As the office is on the ground floor, life is a little easier … when we were having some redecoration work done, I got the builders to put in a “hole” so that the cats could enter and leave through it.  The workmen were concerned about cold air blowing in during the winter – so I described to them that wonderful invention of Sir Isaac Newton’s – the cat flap.

To be fair, the idea of having special holes for cats to gain access to a building – or to leave it – dates back to long before Sir Isaac … there are examples from Ancient Eqypt and Chaucer describes something similar in one of the Canterbury Tales … but there is the wonderful story of Sir Isaac cutting holes in a door, one for his cat and another for her kittens … although the great genius hadn’t realized that the kitten would simply use the same hole as their mother … holes which boarded up and  which were still visible in the door over a hundred years later.

As it happens, the workmen were familiar with the idea having, seen it in the movies, but couldn’t understand why anyone would want one – after all, you could simply open the fortichka - the little fanlight window that is used for ventilation.

The hole, however, has a distinct advantage … it is customized to the size of a cat … whereas the fortichka, even if it doesn’t seem possible for a human to squeeze their way through it, can still provide an enterprising cat burglar with a means of access … as, unfortunately, we have discovered to our cost.

The workmen also seemed concerned about the hole being used by “strays” exploring the neighbourhood and finding their way in … and they found it highly amusing when I mentioned that, in the West, there are special cat flaps which operate together with radio transmitters in cat collars so that only certain cats with the right “key” can o[pen them … they rolled around laughing … and, to be honest, I can’t say I blame them.  Anyway, they made me a special slider, so that I could open and close the hole to permit or deny access if I so desired.

Since then I have seen the odd cat flap for sale here in Kyrgyzstan – although there are still not common … and seem to be considered simply as a fad for someone who wants to coddle their pet … someone with more money than sense.  Still, who knows, in the course of time the idea might catch on.

The news report

Not everyone likes cats – although it is sometimes hard to imagine – given the amount of Cat photos and videos posted on social media outlets like Facebook and Youtube.

I obviously like cats – I have a numbers and often refer to them in my postcards. At the moment I have four, (we have found homes for most of that have found their way into the office, and some have decided to wander off for some reason and to fend for themselves), and visitors to the office are often surprised to see them.

As a result, stories on the web about cats often attract my attention and, as it happens, in the recent past cat shows in Bishkek have been included special Photo features in a variety of newspapers around the globe … usually for some of the more outlandish pictures.

Last month, here in Bishkek, we hosted the Global Snow Leopard Conservation Forum.

Representatives of twelve different countries attended, as well as several international organizations such as the World Bank.

It had been hoped to attract a number of famous names to attend, but in the end only a few actually made it, including the presenter of a Russian wildlife TV programme.

On the other hand, the President, Almazbek Atambaev, attended and stressed the importance of the project … noting that although conservation of the snow leopard may seem a minor issue against the large-scale problems the mankind faces today, “… the experience of history teaches there are no minor issues in the relationship with the nature.”

The delegates adopted a Declaration, (to be known as the Bishkek Declaration), and decided to set up a fund for implementing it – the executive secretariat to be hosted in Bishkek.

On a practical level, the German based Nature and Biodiversity Conservation Union, (NABU), announced at the forum that they a launching a new project in the Tien Shan … creating a specially protected area in Kyrgyzstan and Kazakhstan aimed at the protection of endangered species such as the Snow Leopard, but also the The Tien Shan Brown Bear and the Argarli, (Marco Polo Sheep).

As part of the project it is hoped to promote ecologic tourism by establishing hiking trails; opening guest houses; creating tourist packages, as well as giving recommendations for the development of tourism in protected areas.

It was also decided to establish 23rd October as the Day of the Snow Leopard, and Kyrgyzstan announced that 2015 would be the Year of the Snow Leopard.

In fact, it now appears that the Snow Leopard might be important for our understanding of the evolution of the world’s “big cats” – the lion, tiger, jaguar, leopard, and snow leopard … all members of the Panthera genus, (as opposed to the more common Felidae … such as our common house cat).

There was an interesting news report on the on the BBC News website: Oldest big cat fossil found in Tibet, (based on a report in the Proceedings of the Royal Society – the full text of the article is available free of charge on line as well as an interesting youtube clip), apparently a group of paleontologists have discovered skull fragments which are thought to be between four and almost six million years old in the Himalayas … which is said to be “similar to a snow leopard”.

This is interesting for a number of reasons …

• The scientists were surprised to come across a the fossilized remains of a cat … in this area of Tibet other animals predominate: antelope, badgers weasels and foxes … and also, interestingly, rhinos … and then several examples of this new species.
• Analysis of the fragments show that they are from a previously unknown species, (which has been dubbed Panthera blytheae), which is now extinct but appears to have a territory which seems overlap that of several of the species that we know today … such as that of the snow leopard.
• Also, it supports the theory that the world’s big cats of today probably originated here in Central Asia, migrating over time to cover the globe. It appears that, although scientists had postulated that this was the case, until now the earliest fossil evidence of big cats comes from Africa … which caused a bit of a problem.

Ilbirs - the Snow leopard ... a candidate for the title "felisKyrgyzstanus"?

It’s not an official holiday, but in Japan 22nd February is commemorated as Cat Day., and so it seemed an appropriate occasion to look at felis Kyrgyzstanus.  (I suppose that I had better own up and admit that I made that up … there is no such breed.)

I am well known for my cats - typical domestic animals which I have referred to occasionally in my postcards – for example when I described their gymnastic abilities or when Garfield went for a walk on the wild side.

Unfortunately, Kyrgyzstan’s cats have sometimes been featured in the world’s media, like when the Don Sphynx won a local Cat Show and was awarded the title the World’s Scariest Cat by several newspapers who picked up on the photos from a news agency, or by when  it was announced that stray dogs and cats were to be shot on Bishkek’s streets.

If there was a cat that deserved the title then presumably it would be Ilbirs – the snow leopard … the only example of the “Big Cats” that is still to be found in Kyrgyzstan; (at one time Tigers and Cheetahs roamed through the forests of Kyrgyzstan but although Wikipedia lists them both amongst the mammals of Kyrgyzstan … they have long since disappeared).

For the record: It seems that cats are not indigenous to Japan; it is believed that they were introduced from China sometime about the 6th century, (in the Nara period).   They were taken onto ships as working animals, to protect the valuable ships stores, and sacred Buddhist books), from mice.   During the Heian period, (794-1192), cats began to be depicted in pictures, for example in books.  Subsequently, over the centuries, they settled throughout Japan and evolved, resulting in the well-known Japanese breed, Japanese Bobtail – with its characteristic round muzzle and short tail.

The reason that 22nd February has been designated as Cat Day is an example of Japanese humour  … it seems that the word for two in Japanese is “ni” (or “nee”), but it is often pronounced as “nyan”.  If the Brits associate the sound made by cats with the onomatopoeic ”meow”, it seems that in Japan they associate it with “nyan” … “nyan, nyan, nyan”, or “2 2 2 ” and the date February 22nd is written as “22/2″.

As well as the snow leopard, however, cats indigenous to Kyrgyzstan include:

The Eurasian Lynx, (lynx lynx – also called the Turkestan Lynx), is a subspecies which has not been greatly studied.  A long-legged, short-tailed, cat which can grow to just over a meter in length.  Its fur changes colour according to the season: yellow-brown in the summer, but paler in the winter months, with dark spots on the underbelly.  The tail has a dark tip and the ears have long tufts of hair which can be as long as 3cm. It is found throughout the central mountain belt … and prefers wooded areas	The Eurasian Lynx
Pallas's Cat	The Manal, (felis manul – also known asPallas’s cat), is a small, (50-60cm long), cat with a stout body and short legs, and a long tail which can be half of its body length.  It has long hair on the side of the head which seem to form whiskers.  The ears are short and barely discernible from the head.  The fur is usually yellow grey with brown stripes, and light brown on the underbelly.It is found mainly in the upland zones of the Kemin valley and parts of the Eastern Issyk Kul hollow, although there is no reliable recent reports of its occurrence.
The Old World Wildcat, (Felis silvestrius although usually referred to locally asfelis libyca), is distributed throughout most of Africa Europe and much of Asia – including Kyrgyzstan.  A small cat that reminds people of the domestic cat although it is longer and has a shorter neck.  Typically it sports a long tail and four black stripes on its head .  The body fur is often has incomplete stripes and the tail looks as if it is ringed.  It’s a nocturnal animal and lives in low lying forests or  amongst the bushes and reeds of marshy swampland, up to about 2000 meters.It is found along the floodplains of the Chui and Talas rivers and the shores of Lake Issyk Kul in the North … and along the Kara Darya in the Osh oblast.	Felis silvestrius - the wildcat

In addition, there is the Jungle Cat, (felis chaus), grows to about 85cm in length and is covered by a yellow, brown and grey fur.  It has a short tail and high shoulders.  The Jungle Cat inhabits lowland areas amongst reeds in marshland and along lake shores in desert areas.  Hoewever, there is some doubt if it really occurs in this area – although there were some identifications in the early part of the twentieth century, its normal distribution is outside this region.

All of these animals are listed in the Red Data Book of endangered species.

Incidentally, Although you could be forgiven for thinking that the Marbled Polecat, is another … it’s actually a weasel and takes its name due to its distinctive colouring: a mottled yellow and brown on the top part of the body, with a band around its face and eyes; a dark brown underside, short legs and ears which are tipped with white and a yellow tail.  Although generally a nocturnal animal, it can be active during the daytime.  It eats mainly small rodents but is also known to eat lizards and large insects.  When it feels it threatened, it raises its tail hair, arching the tail over its back and emits a foul smell to ward of the attacker.

The polecat used to live on the dry foothills of the steppes and low lying valleys … all areas which are now occupied by man and used for agriculture thus robbing it of its natural habitat.  As a consequence, it is no longer encountered in the Chui, Talas and Ferghana valleys – and seems to be restricted to the undeveloped regions of Djalal Abad oblast – and, interestingly, on the Kazakh side of the Chui river.

A mugshot of the intruder ... taken earlier ...

On Sunday we had an intruder in the office … and in my attempt to try and tackle him, I came off worst.

We have had a number of intruders in the past and I have come off worst in some of those other encounters … but this time the intruder wasn’t of the two legged variety, he was a rather healthy Siamese cat who had climbed through the fortichka, a little window used for ventilation, in the search for food.

We’ve seen him around the place quite a bit because he has taken a fancy to Mathilda, the black and white Queen that adopted us a few years ago.

Unfortunately for him, she wasn’t the only cat in the office at the time, and the others – all males – took offence to his presence and so he beat a hasty retreat behind one of the radiators.

... and when he was in a more relaxed mood!

In the past he has been shy and steered a course well clear of us but on occasion Mathilda’s calming influence has encouraged him to approach us and even allowed him to stroke him … although he has still been extremely nervous and bolted at the fist suggestion of any sudden movement.

Anyway, I left the window open and closed all the doors into the kitchen, (with all the cats on the other side), in the hope and expectation that in the calm the followed he would make his own way out.  A couple of hours later, however, when it was time for me to pack up, turn on the alarm and go home for the evening … he was still cowering behind the radiator.

I managed to coax him out from the behind the radiator and he was sitting on the window ledge.  I reached out and took hold of him firmly, one hand behind the neck and the other on his back.  He twisted his head and lunged.    I felt a searing pain as his fangs sank into the flesh of my hand, just behind the knuckle of the index finger.     I let go and he sung his head once more, this time biting in to my wrist.

Apart from the pain, the gushing blood from two very neat and very deep puncture wounds, the shock was striking.  The cat then jumped down from the windowsill and ran behind the kitchen sink.  That was the last I saw of him because I was busy tending to my wounds … for all I know he could still be there … (after all, I wasn’t too eager for a repeat encounter) … but I don’t think so.

I also knew that I now had to wash the wound and stem the flow of blood, so I set about doing just that … first the soap and water … then the “spirit”, iodine and antiseptic cream … then a bandage from a roll of cotton lint.  I had to get help, of course, to do the bandage as I couldn’t really apply it with just one hand.   By now there was a distinct swelling and I felt a throbbing in the veins.  Taking my shirt off to go to bed was also a bit of an ordeal.

Monday morning saw the next instalment in the saga.

I couldn’t remember when I last had a Tetanus inoculation, so I thought that I ought to go off to the polyclinic to get one and, when Lisa arrived for work, off we trotted.  Now these clinics are usually quite crowded and this was first thing on Monday morning, so I was expecting a fairly long wait … but, as it happens, everything went relatively smoothly … except for the fact that the doctor said I should also have an injection against rabies.

To be honest, I had wondered about that … Most of the instances of rabies in Kyrgyzstan are to be found in the rural regions and amongst wild animals.  Although the cat, as far as I can tell, is perfectly healthy, it is not a domestic pet … so it made sense and so I had the first in a course of injections … at least three and possibly six over the next the or four weeks.

That means – no alcohol and no saunas for the time being.  The doctor seemed to think that might be a problem despite the fact that I tried to assure her that it wouldn’t be … I’ll let you guess whether she was thinking about the alcohol or the sauna.

.

I can’t help feeling a little stupid about the incident … I understand that he was scared stiff and I know that cats can be “wild” and dangerous.

Garfield

Every now and again I write about the cats … over the years we have had lots of them, but at the moment we have five of them, each with their own character, charm and personality:

• There’s Victor, the oldest who is getting on somewhat, in cat years would be have been drawing a pension for some time now, but he’s also in a bad way showing signs of age.  He’s a motley grey and white, who takes life in his stride, lying back sedately observing all that goes on around him.
• Garfield is the other “grand old man”  of the troupe.  We have no idea where he came from, but one day he was sitting in the corridor, outside the office door and when I opened it he just marched in … made his way into the kitchen where there was some food laid out for Victor … and having eaten his fill started to explore his new surroundings … found a niche and fell asleep.
• Mathilda is a black and white Jenny.  She just appeared one day limping on three legs.  I think she must have been a domestic cat who had must have had an accident and run away from home … the bad leg had been bandaged … but not well, and she was obviously in pain.  We took her to the vets and nursed her back to health.  Over the years she has provided us with additional kittens but we’ve been fortunate in that we have been able to find homes for them.

We do have two kittens – well they are practically grown up now – but they are not from Mathilda … like her, they also “appeared” … “out of nowhere”.

• Vasya was one of a pair of Ginger toms who were delivered to us … they had either been abandoned or had found their own way in to the cellar of a neighbouring apartment block and one of the residents brought them to us.  Bandit, Vasya’s brother was very independent and adventurous … one day he went walkabout and never came back … I like to think that he was picked up and adopted by someone.  Vasya was originally much more timid but as he has grown up he, too, has developed his own character.
• Then there is Tom.  If Vasya’s brother was a Bandit, then Tom is like the “loveable rogue” of popular tradition; someone who, although they break the law for their own personal profit, is nice enough and charming so that everyone roots for them.   We don’t actually know where he came from or how he ended up in our office, but one day we suddenly heard a load “meeow”, looked up and there he was sitting on the floor, in the middle of the office, looking up with an expectant look on his face.  He has a rather loud meow and uses it shamefacedly to demand attention.

Everyone in the office seems to have their own favourite.  I, for example, have a special soft spot for Victor - my original cat and who is, after all, the only one who was not a stray.  Mathilda, as the only girl, gets a fair amount of affection and attention.  The kids all love Vasya but he values his freedom and  doesn’t like being smothered so has learned to scamper off when he sees them.  Tom, also runs off but he likes spending time around people and can be really affectionate.  For some reason Garfield manages to tug at people’s heartstrings.

It’s probably because of little thing like yesterday, when I went to take the garbage to the the rubbish bins.  The bins are located in the yard of the next apartment block.  It isn’t far, about a 100meter round trip – it only takes a few minutes and once a day we take plastic bags crammed full with household waste and throw them in these communal bins from where the municipal refuse collection service collect them.

Yesterday I set off and suddenly stopped … something attracted my attention, maybe it was just a premonition, but I turned around and there was Garfield following me.  Oh, yes, he was following me … he wasn’t out for a gentle stroll but was off at a trot … following in my footsteps.

I stopped and when he caught up with me, I bent over and stroked his head.  Then I turned around and set off again.  This sort of thing often happens and I thought that he would turn around and go back … but no, he followed me out onto the sidewalk.

This has also happened before and so I didn’t think anything special of it until I got to the end of fence outside our building.  At this point I expected him to turn back … that’s what usually happens.   It is true that on one occasion,  I was walking down to the hotel and one of the cats started to follow me … we got as far as Prospect Chui before I realized that I was going to have to turn round, pick him up and carry him back … but usually the traffic and passers by are enough to put them off.

This time, however, he carried on following me.

Because it was a Sunday morning, there wasn’t that much passing traffic, (either vehicular or pedestrian), so maybe that is why he seemed more confident.  I kept turning back and one passing woman asked me  jokingly, (I presume she was joking), asked me if he was my bodyguard.

As we passed the steps leading up to one shop doorway, one of the shop assistants smiled and called to him trying to coax him aside.  Back in the UK, we call “puss puss” but here people call “kiss kiss”.  Garfield stopped, looked up enquiringly and then turned and carried on his way.  When he came to the steps leading up to the next shop doorway he climbed up two of the steps and sniffed in the air.  Whatever he could smell, he turned once more and continued to follow me.

We made our way into the yard and negotiated our way through the parked vehicles – and one moving vehicle – to the bins where I threw our bags of rubbish.  Then we turned and made our way back home.

I hope that Garfield enjoyed his walk on the wild side.

The Daily Mail article

It’s amazing how many people seem to find pictures of cats alluring.  A few days ago, however, there was a startling photo posted  on a series of websites. The Daily Mail, in the UK, headlined the story about a cat show in Bishkek, “Is this the world’s scariest cat? Sphynx monster looks more like a gremlin than a pussycat“.

As it happens, I had been invited to the Cat Show and had intended to go  but, even though it was held on a Sunday, work me in the office and I was sorry to have missed the sight.

I must admit that the photo did not make the particular specimen look particularly appealing, but the words “monster” and “gremlin” seemed a little unkind … and two other photos in the report of the cat dressed up as a bride in a wedding dress certainly made me want to squirm.

It wasn’t, however, a universal reaction.  I was impressed, for example, by the reaction of Tatiana, my accountant, when I showed her the article: “Ohhh, kakaya kasavitsa!“, (What a Beauty!).

The cat is one of the Don Sphinx species, a hairless breed of cat which is of fairly recent origin.  The bloodline can be traced back to the discovery of a hairless cat by a cat breeder in Rostov-on-Don back in 1987 which was probably a cross with a more ancient breed of hairless cat, the Sphinx Cat.  Although not all registries recognize the breed, the Donskoy was recognized by the World Cat Federation ten years later and by the International Cat Association in 2005.  Despite their cold appearance, the breed is known to be a warm, affectionate and highly intelligent.

Now, at the moment I have five cats, (Victor – the original, Garfield – the not so original name chosen for a Ginger Tom, Mathilda – the only femal, Vasya and Tom – the two kittens); none of them Donskoys.  Victor is the only one who wasn’t a stray that happened to wander in, or was abandoned outside the office by someone knowing that we would take them in and try to find them a home.  We’ve had lots more strays dumped on us but we’ve managed to find homes for most of them.

These five all have a story and are now part of our “family” … or perhaps that should be part of the “workforce” as they spend most of the day with us in the office.  They even have their own “Job Description” which I put together a few years ago for a course.

Like me, Tatiana also has a number of cats … and dogs … and, from time to time, an assortment of other animals.  Her house, for example, was once home to rats, frogs … and spiders … and … well, you get the point.  That’s nothing, however, compared to Esengeldiev Mukeeva, the president of the Kyr Felinology Cat Club which organized the show, who has something like twenty cats and dogs in her home.

Another popular photo from the show scanned from the local Vecherniy Bishkek newspaper

There were lots of other photos taken at that Cat Show, one of which was featured on a number of websites … of a particularly large specimen; giving something of a new meaning to the phrase “big cats”.

Incidentally, Tom is getting to be a “big cat”, himself.  We sometimes joke that he is a “feeding machine”.  As soon as I walk into the office in the early morning he meanders round my feet, looking up at me with his wide yellow green eyes and mewing loudly, demanding to be fed.   Having hoovered up whatever I’ve laid out for him, he’ll be back again an hour later.  He sits on my lap and bites my are if I have the temerity to try and ignore his requests.

Mind you, he gets plenty of exercise, so he should work all the weight he is putting on.  Having seen the older cats coming and going by the fortichka, the little fanlight in the kitchen window provided for ventilation purposes, he has managed to work out how to escape into the fresh air – something that Vasya has yet to do.

The other day I was in my flat on the first floor, (English style – second floor everywhere else in the world), and glanced out of the window to see Tom high up in the tree just outside the building.  I know that cats like climbing high, but I was concerned because I wasn’t sure he would be able to get down, especially when I saw that Vasya had chased him up the tree and was looking about distinctly nervous.

I remembered how many years ago, back in the UK, Rosie, (my first cat), had gone missing shortly after we had moved to North London.  I went out to look for her, called her name and whistled … nothing … then, far away in the distance I could hear her mewing.  I followed the sound across some open park land and a busy major road and looked up a tree … and there she was, trapped, scared out of her wits and not able to get down.  I went back home and fetched a ladder … and a friend.  The ladder wasn’t tall enough to reach her … but as my friend was little taller than me he climbed up and managed to grab hold of her.  Unfortunately, she panicked and lashed out at him, scratching his arm and he dropped her.  She landed on her feet – stared down the road and ran for home … with us in hot pursuit.  Fortunately, no harm was done to her … apart from being scared witless and never crossing that particular green again.

I had visions of having to effect another such rescue, but I needn’t have worried … First Tom and then Vasya edged their way back down the tree trunk and returned to terra firma.  They weren’t put off by their adventure and still race each other to the treetops.  My heart still misses a beat, but I feel a lot easier about it now.

I will feel even easier having come across a fascinating post on the BBC website: Who, What, Why: How do cats survive falls from great heights?.  I had thought it was just an urban myth that cats always managed to land on their feet … akin to them having nine lives … but it seems that there is some scientific justification to it.

A thoughtful Tom

Tom, the youngest of the kittens has a loud mew and a very demanding character.

We think that someone abandoned him when he was only a few months old, possibly because of his mew and possibly because he hadn’t been properly house trained … something I think we have finally dealt with.  We are not sure, because one day he just appeared in the middle of the office, looked up at Tatiana my accountant and meowed … loudly.

If he had somehow managed to sneak in … it was now impossible to miss him.

Something like this has happened before.  Garfield also just turned up, stood outside the door of the office and just waited until someone opened it.  Then he calmly walked in, made his way to the kitchen and started demolishing a plate of Kit-e-Kat that had been laid out for Vita, (my original cat, now 14 years old).

On another occasion, Tatiana looked up from her accounts and out of the window and saw somebody laying down a bowl of food just outside the window and putting a kitten to it, before turning round and running off.

This time, no one actually saw Tom arrive.  He was just there.  Thinking of our previous experience we went outside to see if we could see anyone, but there was no-one.  If someone had indeed abandoned him, then they had long since disappeared.

To be honest, he’s not the most beautiful of cats … like Matilda, (one of my five cats and the only female), he’s black and white.  However, whereas she is predominantly black with white patches, he is much lighter and the black fur provides him with a mottled pattern.  As is usually the case with such colourings, the white often looks a dirty grey – especially around the flanks of the torso.

He is basically an eating machine.  Whereas most of the other cats used to be content to be fed once or twice a day, Tom will stand in the middle of the kitchen floor every two hours and mew – loudly – looking up at me with those yellowy-green eyes of his, demanding to be fed, and not desisting until I have opened the cupboard and put down a plate of something or other.  The other cats already know that if they hear his meow from the kitchen, then they need to come running … there’s food to be had.  As a result he, and the others for that matter, are rapidly putting on weight and I have taken  laying out smaller portions than I used to do.

I am not sure why we gave him the name Tom.  Maxim chose the name and it just stuck.  Tom, Tommy, Tomik … all variations of the name you can sometimes hear us calling … sometimes in summons, sometimes in despair.

Despair?  Yes.  You see, Tom is a rascal; running around the place, poking his nose into everything, getting into everything, upturning things and as a result he gets the blame for everything that goes wrong.  The telephone’s not working – check to see if he’s pulled the cable out of the socket … again.  A cup lies smashed to smithereens on the floor – he’s probably jumped up on the table and sent it flying.  The shyrdak hanging the wall seems to have a bulge in it – because he’s climbed up the chair and sneaked behind it.  The wallpaper seems to be peeling off the wall near the door, because he’s been sharpening his claws on it.   He’s our very own version of Macavity.

On the other hand, he is also very affectionate and it is easy to forgive his each and every misdemeanor.  When I am sitting at the computer, for example, he will jump up onto my lap with no warning at all, giving me a start, and then start crawling up my chest to rub his cheek against my jaw, purring loudly and staring at me with those yellowy-green eyes … preventing me from concentrating on my work.  Sometimes his stretches his neck and pushes his head forward so that he can take a playful bite at my ear lobe.  On other occasions, as lies on my lap and my fingers dart back and forth across the keyboard, he reaches out with a paw, with claws outstretched, and grabs for my hand, the claws sinking into soft flesh as he drags my fingers to his mouth to playfully bite at them.

Tatiana tells me that If I leave the office for any reason at all, then he walks up to the door, looks at it plaintifully and meows.

He walks up to the adult cats and rubs his cheek up against them.  At first, they weren’t sure what to make of him.  Nowadays, Vita tends to ignore him, although watches him attentively whist trying to create a disinterested demeanor. Matilda, on the other hand accepts his attentions and they can often be seen lying together, washing each other.  Only Garfield remains unsure, occasionally hissing jealously at him in warning.

He gets on well with Vasya, another abandoned kitten about a month older than him, but with a totally different character.  The two kittens play together all the time – when they aren’t sleeping; chasing each other around the room, jumping at each other, biting each other and play fighting.  Vasya’s much quieter and far more sedate – more regal – so much so that he has become everyone’s darling.  The kids especially adore him.

If Tom is the hooligan, a loevable rogue like his namesake in the cartoons, then Vasya is the equivalent of Jerry – a real Prince Charming.

The Interrobang

I would like to thank everyone who took the trouble to write giving me feedback about the postcards. As I have said to some of them, without their feedback I never know what people make of them.

Last week, for example, there were several messages about movies. Someone said that none of the stories that I highlighted would make a good film, because they appeared to be so outlandish that no-one would believe them. A couple of people wrote and suggested movies for me to watch and I am busy trying to track them down. One person sent me a link to a list of the highest grossing films of all time, and that was fascinating. I was struck about the predominance of Science Fiction and Fantasy, Alternative Realities and Otherworldly themes; basically, escapism. We don’t seem to have come very far from the days of Great Depression and “Sullivan’s Travels”. 

Mind you, he also pointed out that my postcards tend to contain a number of “typos” which have obviously got through my spell checker. 

One of the problems is that I have three spell checkers – one English (British), another for English (United States) and the third is for Russian – mind you that one is quite complicated because of all the case endings. Which one comes into play depends on which computer keyboard Windows thinks I am using at the time. 

Actually, as I explained in my reply, I tend to write the weekly postcard on Friday afternoon, then “sleep on it”, returning to proof read it and to check for any “breaking news” before I send it out on Saturday morning. Obviously, however, mistakes still get through and that’s either because I am still half asleep or perhaps it’s because I am still reading what I thought I had typed rather than what I had actually typed. It’s a problem I have always faced. Often, when I go back over stuff I several weeks before, I often cringe at what are obvious mistakes. 

He’s not the only one to have spotted my errors. There’s someone else, for example, who regularly takes me to task for “Americanisms”. (The French would probably be delighted at that!) I am probably the American keyboard most of the time. 

I saw a tweet on Twitter during the week from someone who is identified as Elizabeth Windsor and in between her constant references to Gin o’clock, she posted this: “One has said it before: There is no such thing as UK English. There is English and there are mistakes.” 

Today is a good day for talking about such things because in America it is National Punctuation Day. Just like Kyrgyzstan, America seems to have a particular habit of designating hundreds of special days in celebration of niche interests to the extent that every day of the year is packed with unofficial holidays and observances. This year sees the Eighth National Punctuation Day. 

Last year, 356 people from the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, France, the Netherlands, Japan, Australia, New Zealand, Malta, and Italy, (in Italian!), submitted more than 3,000 haikus in a Punctuation Haiku Contest. Here’s my favourite from amongst the winning entries: 

Commas are your friends.
Who else makes you stop and breathe
before you run on?

In fact, I am told that I use too many commas and one of my staff, (a language specialist), is constantly telling me off … for my constant abuse of ellipses … multiple question marks and exclamation marks, my confusion over when to use single and double quotation marks and the use of the interrobang(?! or !?).

I can already hear people going “interrobang ?! What on earth is an interrobang!?” It seems to me that it could have been especially devised for Dame Edith Evans’ legendary outraged rendition of the line, “A Handbag?!”, in the film of Oscar Wilde’s “The Importance of Being Earnest”, (which, sadly, is not on the list of high grossing films).

If I have a tendency to abuse both commas and the ellipsis by overuse … then life in Kyrgyzstan gives me plenty of opportunity to do so with the interrobang as well. .

It may be that many will refuse to believe the plot but the blockbuster fantasy storyline about the death/murder of the former head of the President’s Administration, (which Rosa Otunbaeva has described as “sensational” and “terrible”), but this has deepened even further. Do I hear the question: “Is that possible?!”? 

It seems that one of the Deputy Ministers in the Ministry of the Interior, (which is responsible for the law enforcement bodies), has been arrested for involvement in the event. This brought protestors out on to the streets claiming it was all a politically motivated “put up job” and demanding his release and threatening to move their protest on to Bishkek. The authorities, however, refused him bail whilst the investigation continued. He was later released, however, having given an undertaking not to leave the country. 

If this can be taken as a sign that “something is rotten in the State of Kyrgyzstan”, (with apologies to William Shakespeare), then it should be noted that there is a saying here that corruption reaches right up to the seventh floor of the White House … where the President has his/her office. Well, if this arrest is anything to go by, there is certainly something very odd going on at very high levels. It looks as if he won’t be alone for long – along with Bakiev’s nephews who were detained trying to cross the border to Kazakhstan a few weeks ago, it looks like there could be some other high ranking prisoners joining him sometime but, maybe, not soon. The call has gone out once more to demand the extradition of the former President and members of his entourage. 

Prime Minister Atambaev even surprised some Russian journalists by suggesting that Kyrgyzstan should build a special prison just for the leaders of Criminal Gangs to keep them isolated from other prisoners, and make sure that they are, for example, unable to use mobile phones.  (Do I hear an exclamation of outrage: Inmates using mobile phones in prison?!) 

According to Eurasia.net, the fate of all prisoners is not so luxurious. They published a particularly distressing article about the number of Uzbeks for whom detention is far from that – resulting in many cases in death behind bars. 

And it’s not just the Uzbeks. There was another interview of with someone that could, I suppose, be described as a dissident under the previous regime where he described his experiences..

Rosa Otunbaeva has gone to New York to attend the General Assembly of the United Nations, (UN), and she seems to have been busy taking advantage of the possibility to hold lots of meetings, (at least 30 according to one report), with, (or so it seems), everyman … and his wife. 

As it happens, Kyrgyzstan is supposed to be a contender for one of the non-permanent seats on the UN Security Council. One report from Sri Lanka said that they had supported Kyrgyzstan and hoped that Kyrgyzstan would in turn support them in the UN Human Rights Council in thwarting the attempt of the United States to hold a special meeting on the Lessons Learned and Reconciliations report. They seem to think that the US has pre-judged the report. What surprised me in the report, however, wasn’t the possible implication of a trade off, but the final sentence that said Kyrgyzstan was “a country rich in oil, gas and gold.” Oil?!, – well, I know that there are high hopes but nothing has been proved. Gas?! – but we’ve always had troubles with supplies from Uzbekistan on whom we are heavily dependent and have, apparently, just agreed to barter a deal water with Kazakhstan for water and electricity in exchange for supplies of Kazakh gas! 

Sri Lanka isn’t the only South Asian country in the news here this week. It was announced at the beginning of the week that India was planning to develop Torpedo technology at a plant on Lake Issyk Kul. Torpedo testing in a landlocked country?! In fact the Soviet Union used to test torpedoes in the lake and the Dastan company still has some connection with the defence industry projects so, I suppose, it is not so farfetched as an idea – even if it doesn’t make for a blockbuster plot. Although the Indians apparently do have business with one of the firms based up in Issyk Kul, the Director of the plant is saying that he knows nothing of the plans. 

Then again, it’s not all that unusual for stories to appear in the press only to be amended, or even recanted, later … that is, I suppose, unless the story can quietly be dropped. Another embarrassing contradiction came when the Deputy Prime Minister announced that one of the major donor organizations, (I don’t want to call it an “aid agency” because it does a lot more than that), would not be participating in one of the major high profile projects currently being planned. The reaction of the head of the organization’s representative office here in the country was: “Really?!, that’s the first I’ve heard of it.” Although it was possible, she admitted, that she had “out of date information”, but, as far as she was aware, they were going ahead as originally planned. 

At least, even if that particular donor organization does have communication problems, another one has hit a crisis with some of its backers suspending financing over a dispute between staff and management. 

Anyway, the Indians aren’t involved, but in other Military news, there has been a three-day “counter terrorism” exercise being held in the mountains just outside Bishkek, involving troops from a number of other countries from the region, (Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Russia and Tajikistan). There hasn’t been much in the news about it, apart from the fact that it is taking place and the reports have concentrated on the “counter terrorism” aspect with soldiers learning how to deal with extremist militant groups. According to international commentators, however, it appears to be look as if it is preparation for dealing with “Arab Spring” like protests springing up in the region. Then again, I suppose one man’s “extremist militant group” is another man’s “Protest Movement”. We, here in Kyrgyzstan, should know that with our own experience of revolutions..

There are several stories in the news that just won’t go away. 

The forthcoming Presidential election is, of course, the first of these. 

The number of candidates has more or less halved – at the last count there were just 14 remaining candidates registered for the ballot paper, although that could still change. The final list should be known tomorrow when the official campaign should get underway.

Some potential candidates were eliminated from the list, somewhat embarrassingly, because the candidate failed in the Kyrgyz language examination, but most of them were eliminated because they couldn’t provide the Election Commission with the list of 30000 supporting signatures. Two of the eliminations could prove controversial: one was the former Mayor of Bishkek and the other is a prominent Human Rights Campaigner.

Apparently, in a surprise move one of the leading politicians in the country and twice Presidential candidate, Omurbek Tekebaev, has decided to withdraw his candidature. As a sign of the times, the announcement was made by one of his deputies on Twitter! 

Other candidates may yet be knocked off the ballot paper. At least two, (including the Prime Minister), have been warned about violations of the election rules – for campaigning too early and for suspected use of official resources as part of their campaigning. Apparently, they have been warned that further violations could result in their registration as candidates being annulled. 

There are still analytical commentaries that highlight the risk of potential problems. There has been some comment on the ban being imposed on transmitting foreign news for the duration of the election. In a move that is clearly designed to limit the Russian media’s ability to influence voters following the experience of the Parliamentary elections last year, Kyrgyzstan’s televisions stations and cable operators are forbidden from rebroadcasting foreign news bulletins that could affect the outcome for the period between September 25th and the ballot on October 30th. As a result, most operators have no choice but to suspend foreign news programming altogether, including stations like CNN and BBC. If they don’t then they face a USD100,000 fine, They say that they don’t have the necessary capabilities, (personnel or equipment), to record, scrutinize and then rebroadcast material and, anyway, their contracts with the stations prohibit them from making changes to the programming. Needless to say, there is a certain amount of “outrage” that parliament has passed a bill which apparently “endorses censorship”. Mind you, we are now looking to see if there will be an increase in sales of satellite dishes and receivers. 

Oddly enough, I see that distrust of the media is a global issue. Gallup are reporting that even the majority of Americans still do not have confidence in the mass media to report the news fully, accurately, fairly and without bias, regardless of their political affiliations. 

The biggest potential problem, of course, is that of a damaging “North-South divide”. Two stories during the week raised this spectre in totally different ways: One concerned a politician who said that he found it funny when his political opponents tried to make him out as a nationalist, and the other from another politician who is supposed to have said, (and to be fair, I don’t know, I have only seen one reference to it), “In Kyrgyzstan the Kyrgyz are the landlords, the rest are just tenants.” 

On the other hand, there have also been praise from no less than Ban Ki-moon for the work already undertaken in terms of reconciliation and peacebuilding, (and especially the efforts made by Rosa Otunbaeva to ensure a credible and transparent election), including a commitment to provide further technical assistance. 

Other preparations continue apace with organization of polling stations, both here and abroad and the registration of international observers will soon begin. We are likely to spared the embarrassing confusion that we experienced in the parliamentary elections last year over the calculation of the threshold of votes that candidates have to reach. Some of those figures have changed, but more importantly, there will be no separate “additional voters list” – either you are on the electoral roll, in which case you can vote, or you are not, in which case you can’t. There are provisions for people being able to vote in areas apart from their main residence, but in that case they have to register the fact several days beforehand. Most importantly, the threshold figures will be based on the numbers actually voting so that should be more transparent and there shouldn’t be any complaining about attempts to manipulate the figures afterwards. 

Whoever gets the job might have a surprise in store for them. The deputies have decided to draft a bill which, if enacted, would regulate the work of the President. 

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The American airbase is still causing difficulties – and, once more, it is tied up with fuel. This time we are revisiting the claims that jet fuel has been sprayed on agricultural fields by planes using the base. One side is adamant that considerable environmental damage has been caused whist the other insists that it hasn’t and the situation is under constant monitoring. 

At least that makes a change about the ongoing scandal about illegal trading and smuggling fuel across borders. There have, however, been further allegations implicating members of the law enforcement services covering up for fuel smuggling. “Previously concealed facts have come to light”, complete with the names of the guilty parties and we are assured that “measures will be taken”! 

If we become part of the Customs Union, then, I suppose, that should help us deal with the question of smuggling. The border with Kazakhstan should be more open with – and we’ll have help in securing what will become the outer borders of the Union from the other members; Russia seems particularly interested in this. 

The question of Kyrgyzstan’s possible accession to the Customs Union continues to attract attention. The “Customs Union Sceptics”, (with apologies to Britain’s “Eurosceptics”), seems to have been most voluble this week with headlines like “Kyrgyzstan is not ready to join the Customs Union”, “Entrepreneurs urge the government to delay entry in the Customs Union” and according to the International Monetary Fund, (IMF), “Kyrgyzstan needs to mull over advantages and disadvantages in case of entry into Customs Union”. 

The mining sector continues to grab headlines here in Kyrgyzstan, and abroad. This week the focus seems to have been on the issuance of licenses. New rules for this are being introduced but the Prime Minister has rejected the current draft because it says that companies wining a competition for the development of a deposit must have a 20% government share; if that case then why run a competition at all?, he asks. Also one of the deputies has questioned why so many were issued after the revolution last year, (193 out of the 232 that are currently in force). He seems to be particularly concerned over how many were issued to companies based in neighbouring countries and the Prime Minister of Kazakhstan said on an official visit to Kyrgyzstan that they are “interested” in mining sector projects in Kyrgyzstan.

“Kyrgyz Protestors Demand Hijab Be Allowed In Schools”, screamed one headline. The ban on wearing headscarves in schools, that I mentioned last week, led to dozens of demonstrators gathering in front of the Ministry of Education in downtown Bishkek. I wonder if they count as a militant extremist group? It will be interesting to see how this story develops, especially with the news of the court decisions in France. 

Casinos are still in the news. A bill was presented to Parliament to prohibit “gambling activities. Even President Otunbaeva, citing many examples of different social issues, gave her support to the movement. I’m not sure from what I have read if she wants to ban Casinos entirely or simply to control them more tightly by restricting where they can operate in specific geographical zones. Apparently there are some 21 casinos and 55 “gambling clubs” that have received licenses – and they are not all in the capital city. According to one Deputy there are over two thousand gambling centres and points in the country with about three quarters of them in Bishkek. They act as a magnet attracting gamblers from Kazakhstan, Russia and even as far away as Belarus, where such establishments are far more strictly controlled than here. Despite this apparent “invisible earning” which presumably helps the balance of trade, one organization has argued that Casinos do not create wealth in that nothing is manufactured or any service provided, so they simply circulate money. The tax authority seems particularly concerned over the potential loss of revenue; something like 500 million som – that’s more than ten million dollars. (Ten million dollars?!). Anyway, they are arguing against an outright ban and in favour of special “gambling zones” being established. Even though the government asked the parliament to postpone discussion on the bill, because they are clear of the possible implications of such a move – especially on tax revenues – they went ahead and held the debate, passing the bill on its first reading. One deputy proposed that if it eventually became law then illegally operating a casino or gaming machines should be a criminal offence carrying a 10-year prison sentence.

On the economic front, whilst the IMF, who have had a mission in the country, have been predicting a 5% growth in GDP for Kyrgyzstan, the Ministry of Foreign Affairs are more optimistic, putting the figure at 8%. They’ve even broken it down into sectors and they see most of this growth coming in construction. It’s true that there are a lot of construction projects in the country but they are putting the figure at almost 25%!

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On a more personal note, the new email account that I set up for sending out the weekly postcard has now, (after just over a week), received its first spam message. Congratulations are not in order! I did think of publishing the email address and asking everyone to drop him a line – but it’s probably a waste a time. 

Also, we now have yet another two kittens – once again abandoned … this time in a cellar of one of the neighbouring apartment blocks. The two very timid “Ginger Toms”, (about two or two and a half months old), that arrived in a box have settled in well and are now making their presence felt and displaying their individual characters … and threatening to eat me out of house and home. .

Well, I apostrophe ll have to put a full stop to this postcard now as comma once again comma I apostrophe ve well and truly exceeded my word limit comma yet again open brackets exclamation mark close brackets ellipsis but I hope that you have comma at least comma found it open quotation marks interesting close quotation marks full stop.

Happy Punctuation Day! … and to Tony, (my brother), Happy Birthday!! (You can “put out the flags” – This year, I remembered!)

Yes, that really was me ... many, many years ago!

One day I was sitting in a cafe and having a conversation with a young Kyrgyz acquaintance, Aybek, who expressed great sympathy for me.

Sympathy? Why sympathy? Because I was single and have no children.

When I was a schoolteacher, if someone had made a similar comment I would have replied that I had “the best of all possible worlds” — I had 800 children but I was able to say “Goodnight” to them at four o’clock every evening and I didn’t have either the hassles nor the expenses involved with bringing up a family.

On this occasion I couldn’t say that. The attitude of the Kyrgyz is quite different and they don’t understand the modern western approach to the family. The family is a vital part of their society. Everything revolves around the family.

I used to think it was all about perpetuating the family name. I once went to a birthday party for a Babushka — the grandmother of my of my young acquaintances. Around the table sat the whole of the extended family in Bishkek … her sons and daughters, son-in-laws and daughters-in-law, grandchildren … and a host of family friends like myself. The conversation got round to family members who had moved away and were now in Russia, Uzbekistan or some other far flung part of the former Soviet Union. One of her sons pointed out that, although there were many grandchildren, only his children would carry the family name — and as they were both sons, only they would be able to perpetuate the family name for future generations.

But, there is more to it than that. There is a great respect amongst the Kyrgyz for the older generation. The Aksakals – “old men with white beards” – hold a special place in Kyrgyz society. By tradition, the youngest son, always lives in parents home looking after them in their old age – and his reward was to inherit the family yurt (the traditional tented home of the nomadic herdsman).

Aybek’s sympathy arose out of concern for me in my old age. I would have no comfort in my old age – no-one to watch over me and care for me. I could end up in an “old people’s home” – which is not necessarily a very attractive prospect even in the West.

I couldn’t help but remember my parents. My mother was one of eight children, and my father one of six. By the time they died they were the only members of their respective families left in their home town. Everyone else had moved away. To America, to New Zealand, to other parts of the UK, … and I moved to Kyrgyzstan! When my father was finally fell ill and was taken to hospital he said to me: “I’m not afraid of dying — but I would have liked to have gone home one more time.” What would happen to me?

I tried to make a joke – I may not have children, but I have my cats. Aybek wouldn’t accept that. The cats won’t look after you, cook your meals, clean the house …

That’s true, but they do provide me with company and much more besides.

When I first came to Bishkek I lived with friends. Life was quite comfortable, but the time came to move on and I moved into my own flat — nothing luxurious, but comfortable. One of my friends gave me a kitten to keep me company. Sinok — it’s Russian for “son”, or “sonny” — was a little bundle of energy. He quickly settled in and made friends with all the neighbours. Then one day came a shock.

I was in my office and there was a knock at the door. It was a little girl, one of our neighbours. What she said surprises me still today, many years later. “They’ve stolen Sinok.” Pardon? What was that? Apparently, two middle aged ladies had been walking along the street and seen him playing in the yard. They called him, and without any fear he went up to them. They picked him up and began to walk off with him. The girl ran after them … “What are you doing?, where are you taking him?”. They said that they thought he was a stray and when she said “No he’s not”, they pushed her to the ground and got into a taxi. She ran to tell me. Of course, it was too late. Even though we later found the taxi and discovered where he had taken the women it didn’t help. We advertised, and got offered all sorts of replacement kittens – but that didn’t help. I wanted Sinok back. I can’t tell you how depressed I felt. Of course, if it had been a child, then “all hell would have been let loose” — but it was just a kitten. So I had to accept it.

What makes it worse was the stories I was told about cats being stolen and then eaten.

After a couple of weeks, it was clear that Sinok wasn’t coming back and another friend appeared one morning with two kittens – one grey and the other a tabby. “Choose which one you want”, he said. “Why must I choose? Can’t I have both?”. It had occurred to me that they could keep each other company, play with each other, and were less likely to wander or be stolen if there was a pair. And so I acquired Zita and Gita.

At the time we thought they were both girls – but it later turned out that Zita was really a tomcat – and now he is confused because some people call him Zita, but others have taken to calling him Vita, or Victor…

For a long time we lived a nice contented life. They come when I whistle and show me great affection. They don’t argue with each other. They don’t mess up the house. They run after me if I leave for a meeting. Some people say they are more like dogs than cats.

Although they are brother and sister, they are totally different. Gita is a huntress. Many is the time I have had to take a dead or dying bird out of her mouth. “Thank you, but you don’t need to bring your trophies home”, I tell her – both in Russian and English. Sorry, but I can’t say it in Kyrgyz. Zita, on the other hand, although he enjoys playing with string or a ball, is as lazy as anything. He has tried to catch his own prey, but it seems to be so much easier to sit and watch until his sister tires with her new toy, and then sneak up and steal it when she abandons it.

If I have any complaint about them it is that they wake me up at five o’clock in the morning, mewing to be let out.

Then something happened. One of my neighbours brought home a “ginger tom” — Reggie. Now, cat society seems to have it’s own set of rules. Tom cats have a habit of wandering. Reggie does his fair bit of wandering — but never very far. Usually he just comes next door, to visit Zita, Gita and me. The fact that he could be guaranteed an extra meal may have been an incentive … but he soon settled in — and although he never became “a member of the family”, he is more than just a visitor.

OK — so that’s three cats.

Night time, there is often a cat’s chorus in the yard outside my flat. Obviously there are other cats in the neighbourhood. Most of them don’t seem to have homes. They are strays. Most of the time they are ravishingly hungry. Of course, they can cry out very loud. Some days I am suiting in my office and I can hear this mewing. I should know better by now and just ignore it … but something inside me won’t let me. I get up to go and investigate.

And that is how I have managed to acquire five strays. Dealing with the first one, “Gray”, was easy. Tatiana, my accountant, fell in love with him and offered him a home – where he soon settled in with the other five, the two dogs, the rat, the fish and the frogs (yes, the frogs).

Next came “Peter” – a Siamese. He was already fully grown and it seems obvious he had been “thrown out” … taken to a strange part of town and dumped. His tail was broken and at another point it was wounded and needed attention.

When he saw a plate of food he stopped being a cat and became a vacuum cleaner. He wolfed everything down as if there was no tomorrow. It seemed that not only it was a long time since he had last eaten, it was as if he didn’t know when he would eat again.

He didn’t seem to believe his luck and for several weeks wouldn’t leave the office – unless it was to follow me upstairs to my flat – where he liked nothing better than to sleep on my bed – or better still under the sheets. He would sneak under the blanket whilst I was fast asleep and I would wake up with a mouthful of fur as he snuggled up into my neck.

He has grown so big and waddles around that I say he isn’t really a cat, he’s more like a sheep. Tatiana says he is more like a horse.

He gets on fairly well with Gita and Zita. At first they weren’t sure what to make of him. But the jealousy died down and the three of them were almost inseparable. Peter, however, is really a solitary cat. He wants to be the only pet and although he is happy to put up with these two he has no time for the later arrivals.

Next to appear was Alicia. Another Siamese. When she first appeared she was totally wild. She didn’t want to be handled and cowered in front of the others, growling in a threatening manner. She soon settled in, however, and then started growing fat. But it wasn’t that she was eating rather well. It appears that she was expecting kittens.

She grew fatter and fatter, then suddenly one day she appeared and was so small it was hard to image it was the same cat. We spent ages looking for the kittens, and although we could sometimes hear them, we never found them. Then one day, when they already quite big, they appeared on the lawn in front of the building. Two of them – one with pure white fur and the other a tabby with four different colours in her marking. They found the plates of food and settled in. We named then Agatha and Christie.

Christie, the white one, proved to be very popular. Lots of people wanted to adopt her – but Agatha was ignored by everyone. I don’t know why, because she seemed to have the better character and was much more playful and affectionate. Anyway, Christie found a home and Agatha is still with us. She is now, probably, too old to find a new owner … so that makes five cats – six if you count Reggie.

Marquise appeared next – a small black stray with a white streak down his back. Another vacuum cleaner when it comes to food. His problem, however, is that although he likes human company, he is scared of the other cats and sits angrily growling at the others. When he first started visiting, he would announce his arrival with loud meows and would wander from room to room looking for plates of food, only to crouch and growl if one of the others would appear. Now, he has learned to sneak in unannounced in hope of avoiding the others and only makes a noise when he sure the coast is clear.

Alicia has now produced her second litter. She obviously became pregnant straight after dropping the first litter — and, incidentally, has done so once again after dropping her second – so I am expecting some others kittens in another couple of months time.

It was just like last time. One evening she was as a big cat, but in the morning she appeared just a slip of her former self. Once again we searched in vain for the kittens. This time, however, she only waited a week before she brought them “home”. One Saturday I came into the office and heard some mewing. At first I thought it was Agatha, but when I listened closely I could distinguish two different voices. Then she wandered in with a little ball of fluff in he teeth, glanced up at me and, apart from that, paying me absolutely no attention, marched past and put the new arrival in a corner. “So, there are three kittens this time”, I thought to myself – but later I discovered a fourth – all with totally different markings and characters. This time there were three male kittens and it was easier finding them a home. I am having trouble finding a suitable home for the girl (I haven’t named them yet … it seems to make parting with them that much more difficult), but the tom cats are all suitably placed.

Alicia isn’t quite sure of what to think about the disappearing kittens. She spends time mewing, calling, and when they don’t respond she wanders around the place, searching high and low. She has taken to lying across the doorway as if to inspect each person as they leave to see if they are taking her children away.

So, at one time I was feeding eleven cats – plus the odd one which might treat us like a restaurant and wander in for a snack. I was told that I could “get rid” of them fairly easily – just put them in a sack and drop them in the Be-Che-Ke – the Bolshoi Chui Canal, but I couldn’t do that.

Unfortunately, they didn’t come alone. They brought little friends with them – fleas. One Friday afternoon we had a great time locking them in the bathroom, one by one – kittens and all – and shampooing them with special shampoo, and then fumigating the place. I had to sit for several hours out in the sun while they dried out and the chemicals did their work in the office. There I was sitting on a bench in the yard, with the kittens in a bucket and cats sitting in a circle around me – watching me with betrayed looks on their faces. More than one person walking along the street did a double take when they saw us.

A few days ago another cat appeared, mewing loudly. This one is about two or three months old, an interesting fawn colour, and obviously used to human company. She’s not scared of us humans – but doesn’t know what to make of the other cats. Perhaps she will stay – perhaps not.

So, 2003 has not exactly been the “year of the tourist” as far as we are concerned, and to the Chinese it may be the “year of the Ram” – but for me, I suppose it is turning out to be “the year of the Cats”.

For the record: Gita disappeared one day, never to return, but Zita is still with me, although now we all call him Victor. The others have all been found homes so Victor (Zita) now rules the roost as king of the office. He is very placid and gained quite a fan club. Visitors often ask after him and it sometimes seems that they come to see him, not me, as they make such a fuss over him.

He doesn’t get lonely because a couple of other strays have appeared on the scene … or, at least, appear twice a day, (morning and evening), to be fed. A typical case of “Cupboard Love”.